Ever felt like you carry too much responisibility? Feel like you've got too many people wanting too many different things from you and you know that you can't possibly keep them all happy?
Sometimes the weight of responsibilities and expectations can be crushing. It's been a bit like that this week. At the moment I feel the weight of the pastoral needs of my church family, the leadership needs, the administration needs, the needs of some community groups I'm involved in have been a huge issue over the last couple of weeks, then there's the needs of my children, my wife, friends... myself. It seems that wherever I look there are problems that demand my attention.
Sometimes the weight of responsibilities and expectations can be debilitating - it can cause you to do less not more. It plays on your mind and disrupts your sleep (at least it does to me!), so that you are less effective and creative because of mental & physical weariness.
It occurred to me last night that all week I'd been running around trying to do all that needed to be done, fixing problems and living up to my "responsibilities". What I'd actually done was neglected the most important things in favour of the noisy and the urgent. There are things that I felt needed to be done early in the week that hadn't been done because "stuff" came up that got in the way. I felt like I didn't have a choice, but I did.
Sometimes we do have to say no to people (including ourselves). We need to set good boundaries so that we are able to stick to our convictions about what God would have us do instead of what our circumstances or other people want us to do. We need to do this lovingly so that people know we genuinely care for them and their needs, but that we are not controlled by them. Ultimately, this allows us to develop healthy lives and ministries; instead of winding up as stressed-out people pleasers - who usually end up bitter & frustrated as well because in the end they couldn't please everyone anyway!
There's a lot more that can be said on this topic, but enough for now - I've got too many other jobs to get on to ;-)
Friday, 23 March 2007
Monday, 19 March 2007
Being a Person God Uses Part 2
How to Be a Person God Uses Pt 2
1 Thessalonians 2:6b-12
Introduction
Last week we started thinking about How we can be the sort of people God uses. In other words, how you and I can be competent servants of God.
Have you ever felt incompetent?
While some of these clips were pretty amusing, I’m sure we all realise how important it is to be a competent person when you are in charge of a vehicle. When people are incompetent because of a lack of training, poor reflexes, lack of attention, medical conditions or substance abuse; there can be some very serious and tragic consequences. Before anyone takes charge of a vehicle, they should be certain that they are competent to do so.
In the Church a similar principle applies in the area of leadership. In our culture the privilege of driving is subject to a whole series of tests to insure competence. There are also rules of conduct that must be adhered to. If a person is caught breaking those rules then there are penalties that apply. The same is true in terms of leadership within the church. There are standards that determine a person’s eligibility to lead. There are rules that govern how that leadership is exercised, and there are penalties that apply when leaders step outside of what God has set out for them to do.
In 1 Thessalonians chapter 2 the Apostle Paul is briefly outlining some of the characteristics that made Silas, Timothy and himself competent ministers in the Church. Paul and Silas in particular are recognised leaders, and Timothy is in the process of being trained in leadership. This leadership is exercised in teaching, nurturing and ruling over the various churches they establish.
So today we will continue to learn about how we can be competent ministers, regardless of what type of ministry God has called us to; and we will also learn more about the ministry of leadership within the Church.
Pray
There are a number of passages in the Bible which talk about the qualifications necessary for leaders within the Church. Here’s a quick summary:
| Characteristic | Reference |
| Self controlled | 1 Tim 3:2; Titus 1:8 |
| Hospitable | 1 Tim 3:2; Titus 1:8 |
| Able to teach | 1 Tim 3:2, |
| Gentle | 1 Tim 3:3; Titus 1:7 |
| Not quarrelsome | 1 Tim 3:3 |
| Not a lover of money | 1 Tim 3:3 |
| Has a good reputation in the community | 1 Tim 3:7 |
| Not overbearing | Titus 1:7 |
| Not quick-tempered | Titus 1:7 |
| Loves what is good | Titus 1:8 |
| Upright, holy | Titus 1:8 |
| Disciplined | Titus 1:8 |
| Blameless | 1 Tim 3:2,9; Titus 1:6 |
| Faithful in marriage | 1 Tim 3:2,12; Titus 1:7 |
| Temperate | 1 Tim 3:2,8; Titus 1:7 |
| Respectable | 1 Tim 3:2,8 |
| Not given to drunkenness | 1 Tim 3:3,8; Titus 1:7 |
| Manages his household well | 1 Tim 3:4,12 |
| Respected by his children | 1 Tim 3:4-5,12; Titus 1:6 |
| Doesn’t pursue dishonest gain | 1 Tim 3:8; Titus 1:7 |
| Keeps hold of the deep truths | 1 Tim 3:9; Titus 1:9 |
| Sincere | 1 Tim 3:8 |
| Not a recent convert | 1 Tim 3:6 |
| Someone who has been tested | 1 Tim 3:10 |
I hope what you will realise as you look at this list is that these are characteristics that we should all aspire to. These qualifications are a way of identifying mature Christians who are ready to accept the responsibility of leadership. Even the ability to teach, which is a requirement of Elders in the Church, does not mean that each Elder must have a gift in teaching, just that they have the spiritual maturity to be able to teach others in what they say and in how they live.
The reason I point this out is that I want all of us to be aware that what we discover today about how Paul approaches his ministry of spiritual leadership is relevant to all of us. It is what we should all be aspiring to. I hope that this will become increasingly clear as we go through our passage.
Read: 1 Thessalonians 2:6b-12
As apostles of Christ we could have been a burden to you, 7 but we were gentle among you, like a mother caring for her little children. 8 We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us. 9 Surely you remember, brothers, our toil and hardship; we worked night and day in order not to be a burden to anyone while we preached the gospel of God to you.
10 You are witnesses, and so is God, of how holy, righteous and blameless we were among you who believed. 11 For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, 12 encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into his kingdom and glory.
As apostles of Christ we could have been a burden to you,
Because of his position of leadership Paul could have exercised his rights and the authority of his position. He could have expected to have his material needs met by the church. He could have expected that people defer to him and show appropriate respect. As he served them in teaching and nurturing he could expect that they would serve him in return in more practical ways.
Have you ever been in a position where you felt entitled to something from others? I know of people who have given generously to a church over many years, who have felt entitled to control what the church does with it’s finances. I know people who have served in leadership, who have felt entitled to the blind trust and obedience of the congregation; without consultation or explanation of decision making. I know of worship leaders who felt entitled to only choose material that suited their own tastes. I know of pastors who expect their congregation to put in volunteer hours to the church, while they stick rigorously to a 40 hour week.
Paul says “We could have felt entitled to something from you. We could have expected something on the basis of our position and authority, but instead….”
but we were gentle among you, like a mother caring for her little children.
The first thing Paul points out is that he and his companions are not on a power trip. They are not seeking their own advantage, instead they care for the church like a mother cares for her infant children.
Now, Paul is not picturing himself as this sort of mother… (o/h)
Instead, the picture is of a nursing mother – a mother who is still breastfeeding her child. That tenderness that exists between mother and child is the tenderness that Paul felt for the Thessalonians.
Now, we all know that the Church would be a great thing if it weren’t for the people in it! Christians, just like anyone else, can be hard to get along with at times. We hurt each other, we sin against each other. Anyone involved in leadership knows that it can be very painful and frustrating. I believe the same can be true of breastfeeding! However when you think about how a nursing mother treats even the most difficult child, even at great personal cost; that’s the picture that Paul has of leadership. When you think of the bond between mother and child, that’s the relationship between leaders and their congregations that Paul has in mind.
This image is extended in verses 11&12 to include fatherhood.
11 For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, 12 encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into his kingdom and glory
I have a picture on my computer which is a great illustration of this (o/h)
You can see by that man’s uniform that he has a certain authority. He has authority as a Policeman and as a father. Yet he uses his position to serve the needs of his son. You can see by his haircut that he needs to wear that policeman’s hat! ( I can identify with that!) But instead he uses it to serve his son. In the same way Paul used his position not for his own purposes but for the purpose of serving those he was responsible to lead.
This is how the Apostle Peter describes this principle of servant leadership in 1 Peter 5:1-6
To the elders among you, I appeal as a fellow elder, a witness of Christ’s sufferings and one who also will share in the glory to be revealed: 2 Be shepherds of God’s flock that is under your care, serving as overseers—not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not greedy for money, but eager to serve; 3 not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock. 4 And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the crown of glory that will never fade away.
5 Young men, in the same way be submissive to those who are older. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because,
“God opposes the proud
but gives grace to the humble.” a
6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.
I hope you can see that as Paul reflects on his own conduct with the Thessalonians, he is demonstrating the same leadership principles that Peter taught in his letter.
8 We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us. 9 Surely you remember, brothers, our toil and hardship; we worked night and day in order not to be a burden to anyone while we preached the gospel of God to you.
10 You are witnesses, and so is God, of how holy, righteous and blameless we were among you who believed.
In Paul’s time, philosophers and travelling teachers would support themselves in a number of ways. The most desirable method was to be attached to a wealthy patron. This would be of social advantage to the patron and financial advantage to the philosopher. Otherwise, a philosopher might charge a fee for tuition in whatever subjects they had expertise. Some (such as some Cynics) supported themselves by begging. The final method was manual labour. Paul notes in verse 9 that they worked night and day to support themselves. This fits with other historical records which show that artisans such as tentmakers had to work very long hours just to meet their most basic needs. Many of us have a picture of Paul doing a little part-time work while he devoted most of his energy to preaching and teaching. In all likelihood, most of his time was spent teaching in the workshop while he worked! In Ephesians 19 we read that handkerchiefs (ie. sweatbands) and aprons that Paul wore were taken to the sick and the sick were healed. He would have used these things while he worked.
So Paul, one of the most significant leaders in the Church, worked hard in a profession that had very low social status, and paid very poorly; when he could have demanded to have his living expenses met by the churches he served in. He taught that leaders who devote themselves to serving the church should have their needs met, but he did not make use of this right himself.
How does knowing all this help us in our quest to be competent servants of God?
Firstly, a competent minister is a person of integrity - our lives must match what we say. Paul was able to say to the Thessalonians “You are witnesses…”. “You have seen how we lived and you know that our lifestyle backs up our preaching. We don’t just say that God has saved us from sin, we show what it’s like to live free from sin’s control. We don’t just say that God loves you, we show you by loving you ourselves. We don’t just talk about prayer, about humility, about confession, about forgiveness, about acceptance, about encouragement, about sacrifice…. we live it!!”
I don’t care what you sing on Sundays, what you say in Bible study or anywhere else – if you’re lifestyle doesn’t match it, then it’s just hot air. A person who God uses is a person whose walk matches their talk. They are people of integrity.
Secondly, a competent minister is someone who loves intensely. Paul says it was their love for the Thessalonians that caused them to serve in the manner they did. This is in fact the second reason Paul gave, the first (which we looked at last week) was their desire to please God.
Paul wants to be very up front about how much he loves the church family in Thessalonica. Jesus said that this love is a defining characteristic of his people. Do you have that sort of love? As we’ve already pointed out, it isn’t always easy to love people. People can be hurtful, unappreciative, opinionated, selfish and so on. But if Jesus loves you as you are, can you love others as they are too?
Thirdly, a competent minister sacrifices him/herself for the sake of others. This is not saying that they become a doormat. Allowing people to walk all over you is not loving them or you or others around you. However competent ministers are prepared to give up their rights for the sake of serving others. They are able to choose humility and submission. They do not compare themselves to others. They do not focus on their own entitlements. They do not consider their needs more important than others’. This is a particularly difficult thing to do when you are in a position of authority, which is one reason why leadership is the responsibility of the mature. In leadership you need to be constantly testing your own heart to make sure that you are using your authority to serve others and not indulge yourself. You need to guard your heart from bitterness when people don’t submit to your oversight. You need to guard against despondency when people don’t seem to heed your teaching or follow your example. You need to guard against pride that says you are better than or wiser than others. There are a whole lot of other pressures and temptations which can cause you to stop thinking and praying about how you can best serve the people in your care. While this can be particularly acute in leadership, it is true no matter what area you serve in. As ministers our prayer should always be “Lord, help me to serve others in love.”
Conclusion:
From what we’ve been describing today, being a competent minister is hard work! Why bother with that? Why not just accept your free gift of salvation and then just lie low until you die or Jesus returns?
The Bible says that Jesus has given each of us the calling and the gifting to serve in His Kingdom. Our decision is whether or not to be competent servants. Whether or not we will make ourselves available to be used well. You don’t need to do the sort of ministry that Paul did or what I do or anyone else for that matter. God has shaped you for a unique role.
The assurance that Peter gave to Elders who lead well is also an assurance for all of us who serve well in whatever capacity:
1 Peter 5:4
And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the crown of glory that will never fade away.
Let me close with a challenge that Paul gave to Timothy:
2 Timothy 2:15
Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a workman who does not need to be ashamed…
Amen!
Thursday, 15 March 2007
Discipline of Journaling? You've got to be joking!
Well, after what felt like a promising start to my blogging career, all that's been happening lately is me posting up copies of my sermon notes! My last journal-type post was a month ago, so it's time for a re-start.
Part of the difficulty for me has been that a lot of the stuff dominating my thoughts & feelings over the last month or so has not been the sort of stuff that I could share online. Some things need to be kept in fairly small circles. Through it all though I have been learning a lot about what we need to be moving towards as communities of Christians (see "Disillusioned with Church").
I'm excited that we have finally (after 3 years of thinking about it) started a midweek prayer group, which includes people who cannot always get to Sunday services. Prayer is really the engine room of church life for a whole stack of reasons. One thing I love about corporate prayer (when it is done well) is that it draws us closer together vertically and horizontally. It brings us closer to God and to each other. It breaks through suspicions and misunderstandings and fosters a geniune sense of teamwork and mutual care. It encourages boldness in prayer and in prayerful action.
Anyhow, let's see how I go at being a bit more regular in jotting down stuff!
Part of the difficulty for me has been that a lot of the stuff dominating my thoughts & feelings over the last month or so has not been the sort of stuff that I could share online. Some things need to be kept in fairly small circles. Through it all though I have been learning a lot about what we need to be moving towards as communities of Christians (see "Disillusioned with Church").
I'm excited that we have finally (after 3 years of thinking about it) started a midweek prayer group, which includes people who cannot always get to Sunday services. Prayer is really the engine room of church life for a whole stack of reasons. One thing I love about corporate prayer (when it is done well) is that it draws us closer together vertically and horizontally. It brings us closer to God and to each other. It breaks through suspicions and misunderstandings and fosters a geniune sense of teamwork and mutual care. It encourages boldness in prayer and in prayerful action.
Anyhow, let's see how I go at being a bit more regular in jotting down stuff!
Monday, 12 March 2007
Sermon - How to be a person God uses pt 1
How to Be a Person God Uses Pt 1
1 Thessalonians 2:1-6
Introduction
Do you want to be the sort of person who does great things for God? Would you like God to use you to accomplish great things in the lives of people, things that make a difference for eternity? Or does the idea of that sound foolish to you?
I want to read a little blurb that did the rounds on the internet:
Think God Can't Use You? Well, Read On. . .
Noah was a drunkard, Abraham was too old, Isaac was a daydreamer, Jacob was a liar, Leah was ugly, Joseph was abused by his family, sold into slavery and falsely imprisoned, Moses had a stuttering problem, Gideon was afraid, Samson had long hair and was a womanizer, Rahab was a prostitute, Jeremiah and Timothy were too young, David had an affair and was a murderer, Elijah was suicidal, Isaiah preached naked, Jonah ran from God, Naomi was a widow, Job went bankrupt, Peter denied Christ, The Disciples fell asleep while praying, Martha worried about everything, Mary Magdalene was, well you know, the Samaritan woman was divorced, more than once, Zaccheus was too small, Paul was too religious, Timothy had an ulcer . . . AND . . .Lazarus was dead. Now, no more excuses!
The Bible isn’t full of stories about great people – it’s full of stories about a great God who uses all sorts of people – people just like you and me. Today we are going to explore some of the things that get in the way of what God wants to do in and through you, and how we can make sure that those barriers aren’t stopping God from doing great things in our lives in and the lives of those He wants us to touch.
Today we are going to start looking at the ministry of the Apostle Paul in Thessalonica. We have been looking at the Thessalonians themselves and what we can learn from how they responded to the gospel message. Now we want to see what God wants to teach us from how Paul and his companions went about their ministry of sharing the gospel message, because we have been given both those roles to play. We are all people who should be constantly receiving God’s truth and responding to it, and we are also people who possess God’s truth and must share it.
Prayer
Read: 1 Thessalonians 2:1-6a
You know, brothers, that our visit to you was not a failure. 2 We had previously suffered and been insulted in
v. 1: You know, brothers, that our visit to you was not a failure.
We’ve already learned the visit was not a failure because of the work God did in those particular Thessalonians so that the gospel message powerfully changed their lived. Today we will discover that it was not just about what God did in the hearers of the message, but what God did through the messengers that was important.
v. 2a: We had previously suffered and been insulted in
If you don’t remember the story, here’s how Luke describes it in Acts 16:
Once when we were going to the place of prayer, we were met by a slave girl who had a spirit by which she predicted the future. She earned a great deal of money for her owners by fortune-telling. 17 This girl followed Paul and the rest of us, shouting, “These men are servants of the Most High God, who are telling you the way to be saved.” 18 She kept this up for many days. Finally Paul became so troubled that he turned around and said to the spirit, “In the name of Jesus Christ I command you to come out of her!” At that moment the spirit left her.
19 When the owners of the slave girl realized that their hope of making money was gone, they seized Paul and Silas and dragged them into the marketplace to face the authorities. 20 They brought them before the magistrates and said, “These men are Jews, and are throwing our city into an uproar 21 by advocating customs unlawful for us Romans to accept or practice.”
22 The crowd joined in the attack against Paul and Silas, and the magistrates ordered them to be stripped and beaten. 23 After they had been severely flogged, they were thrown into prison, and the jailer was commanded to guard them carefully. 24 Upon receiving such orders, he put them in the inner cell and fastened their feet in the stocks.
That night God sends a powerful earthquake that rocks the jail, opens the prison doors and loosen everyone’s chains! However instead of running away, Paul & Silas stay and share the gospel message with the jailer and his family, who become Christians also. Later, when the magistrates find out that Paul & Silas are Roman citizens, they realise they have made a bad mistake but they still ask Paul & Silas to leave town.
Now, when most people remember the story of Paul & Silas in
You put yourself in Paul’s shoes: First you get harassed day after day by this girl. Finally, you do something about it and the result is that you get your clothes torn off by an angry mob, beaten to a pulp then thrown in jail with your feet clasped in stocks. All of this doesn’t stop them from praying and singing to God, while all the other prisoners listen; but that doesn’t mean that it wasn’t a traumatic event.
Now they rock up to another city, knowing that once again there is going to be plenty of hostile people there, and what are they going to be thinking?
“Hey, let’s do what we did in
So what did they do?
v2b: but with the help of our God we dared to tell you his gospel in spite of strong opposition.
They dared to tell the gospel, despite strong opposition. They knew that it was going to be tough. They had only just come through a tough time. They were scared! Sometimes we have this weird idea of people like Paul that makes out that these people thrive on opposition – they love being called names, beaten up, thrown in prison and so on.
No, Paul says they “dared to tell” the gospel message. Who has ever played a game of dare? I’ve played games like that several times as a younger person. I was never once dared to spend an hour in a spa, or eat a nice meal, or read a good book or anything like that. All the dares I was given were things that could have made me look very silly or were very unpleasant. You don’t dare someone to do something safe or easy. You dare someone to do something that they don’t want to do or something that entails risk.
We read through a list of some famous Bible characters earlier on. Do you think that what they did for God was easy? They took risks! They believed things and did things that weren’t easy or safe. They did things that were beyond their own ability to do! They predicted the future, achieved feats of strength, defeated armies, built a ship, stood up to empires and kings – all because of their faith in God and obedience to Him.
Paul says that this is exactly what he and Silas did in Thessalonica. Verse 3 says “with the help of our God we dared…“
Why? We’ve seen that it was not easy for them to share the gospel in Thessalonica. We know from our background study a few weeks back that they put their lives in danger and had to be smuggled out of town, because exactly the same thing was happening as in
So why did they do it?
Verse 3 tells us what the reasons were not…
v. 3: For the appeal we make does not spring from error or impure motives, nor are we trying to trick you.
Paul says there is no lying or manipulation or trickery or profiteering going on here. We’re not in this because of some delusion or for our own personal gain. We’re not resorting to dodgy methods in order to win you over. Something else is going on.
v. 4a On the contrary, we speak as men approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel.
First of all, we speak because we have been given the authority by God to do so. We are trustworthy messengers and we have been entrusted with the gospel message – the message that every person needs to hear and have an opportunity to respond to.
At this point in time, the gospel message has been transmitted primarily by word of mouth, so it has been vital that the people who are spreading the message are people who are trustworthy. Paul was taught the gospel by Jesus himself, and was confirmed as an Apostle by James, Peter and the other leaders of the early church in
Some people believe that today this sort of condition applies to ministers, priests, evangelists, missionaries and other special classes of Christians. A lot of people lack confidence in their status as being people approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel.
Let me simply say this: “If you have a Bible, then you have been entrusted with the gospel.” God has given the church the means of ensuring that we can speak as people approved to be entrusted with the gospel. We have a way of testing what anyone says that relates to God and His plan of salvation – we use the Bible as our measuring stick. It’s therefore up to each of us to simply make sure that we know it well. That we are confident in what it says. That we are able to share it’s message with others. That is what it means to be entrusted with the gospel. Of course, just like Paul and Silas, we need God’s help to do it, but none of us lack the authority to be a messenger of God.
v. 4b-6: We are not trying to please men but God, who tests our hearts. 5 You know we never used flattery, nor did we put on a mask to cover up greed—God is our witness. 6 We were not looking for praise from men, not from you or anyone else.
Secondly, if we are going to be faithful messengers of the gospel – if we are going to be available to be used by God to change lives – we have to learn to care more about what God thinks than about what people think.
Does not being controlled by what people think mean that we simply don’t care about other people? Is it a flippant “They can think whatever they like, it doesn’t worry me” sort of attitude. “If they don’t like me or what I believe they can go jump for all I care”!
Not at all. Verse 8 talks about how much Paul & Silas loved the Thessalonians. They cared very much about what the Thessalonians thought & how they responded to them and their message. At other times, such as in his second letter to the Corinthian Christians, Paul works very hard to defend his ministry and his reputation – he doesn’t want people thinking badly of him. He doesn’t want to give anyone an excuse to reject his message.
In his morning devotions at the Urban Neighbours of Hope conference last year, Mick Duncan talked about what is “above the line” and what is “below the line”. Above the line are the people or things that we live for. Below the line are the things that we care for and care about, but they are not the people or things that we live for. The Bible is clear that only one thing belongs above the line, and it’s not a thing, but a person. That’s God’s place. It’s where He belongs. To live for anything or anyone except God is idolatry. That is a really helpful image to explain what is happening here. If we are controlled by other people or what they think of us, we are committing idolatry. If we are controlled by our own self esteem or lack of it, that is idolatry. Paul says, “There is only one who I live to please. It’s not myself. It’s not you or any other human being. I live to please God. That’s why I do what I do.” Does Paul care about what others think and say about him? Does he care about what others do to him? Does he care about the hardships he endures and the risks he takes? Yes, to all of that. But he doesn’t live for any of those things. He lives for God. And because he does not live for any of those things he is not controlled by any of them. Instead he is controlled by the Spirit of God. Not perfectly, but that is what his chosen lifestyle is.
What about you?
Today you have a choice to make about whether you will dare to please God by doing what He has called you to do. Paul wrote that God tests our hearts. What does God find above the line in your heart? What or who are you living for? What or who has the power to control what you do? Is it the approval of others you seek? Is it your own pleasure or security? Is it the stuff that you think you need? If you say that God is number one in your life, will you dare to tell His gospel despite whatever opposition you might face or whatever you risk might need to take?
If the answer is yes, I want you to pray steadfastly that God will help you to see the opportunities and take them up. I want you to think about how well you know the gospel and how you can explain it to others, and to get hold of resources that will be a help to you.
Today in Lifegroup we are going to talk further on the topic of healthy self esteem, and how important that is generally, but particularly in the Christian life. In a nutshell, we will be discovering how healthy self esteem flows from healthy God esteem. You’re welcome to join us!
Tuesday, 6 March 2007
Growing up in the Church
Growing Up in the Church
Introduction
How many people here today have grown up in a Christian home?
Today we are going to talk about the challenges and blessings of being a second, third or whatever generation Christian.
However for many of us, it’s almost as if there is no “before” story. We have grown up knowing about Jesus, we’ve grown up being guided by Christian principles. So right from infancy we have tasted something of the goodness of the new life that Jesus came to give. And sure, at some point we needed to decided whether we would continue in it or not, whether we believed what we had been taught and whether we would accept it, but we have had the incredible blessing of tasting the goodness of Christianity right from an early age. But is that a blessing, or does it have great drawbacks?
If you haven’t grown up in a Christian family, what we’re talking about today is important for you to, not only to help you understand others in the church, but also to be prepared to minister to any children that God blesses you with.
Opening Prayer
I had a friend who said to me once “I sometimes wish I had lived a really sinful life before becoming a Christian, so that there would be an obvious change in my life once I was saved”. There are a lot of Christians who feel like they don’t have much of a story to share about how God has worked in their life, because in a sense they have inherited a faith and a lifestyle which has protected them from making a lot of wrong decisions and doing a lot of harm to themselves and others. They feel like their stories are boring because they don’t feature all the drama of a life marred by sin.
At the same time, I know people who wish they had the benefit of growing up in a Christian home. They would have loved the security, love and godly values that go along with striving to live up to what the Bible describes a family should be like. I know many Christians who experienced things that continue to hurt because of their own choices and the choices of others that impacted on them.
What are some of the blessings of growing up in a Christian home?
- You are taught the truth from a young age (2 Tim 3:14-15)
But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.
Last week we talked about how we receive new life in Jesus. God helps us to understand the truth about Jesus and to believe it with our whole heart and mind. Some of us, like Timothy, experience this by hearing and seeing that truth from our parents and our church families. What we saw and heard made us wise for salvation. We knew what was true and what we needed to do in response.
There are many people who grow up in families and societies that are hostile to God and to the church, or indifferent. Those children inherit values and attitudes that actually keep them away from God. God needs to find other ways to break into their lives to show them the truth.
Christian parents must understand the importance of their role in bringing their children up in the training and instruction of the Lord, as it says in Ephesians 6:4.
- You are protected from a life ravaged by sin
Romans 7:5 says: “For when we were controlled by the sinful nature, a the sinful passions aroused by the law were at work in our bodies, so that we bore fruit for death.”
We need to remember how the Bible defines sin. Sometimes people think of sin as the things that God doesn’t approve of. It’s as though we face a whole smorgasbord of different options, some of them are OK with God and some aren’t. Some people say “That’s fine if you just want to choose from those options, but I want to sample the whole lot.” No, sin is falling short of God’s standards. It’s missing the mark. When we sin we fall short of the goodness of God. We fall short of the life that He intended for us.
Instead of the blessing of marital faithfulness, there is the burden of infidelity. Instead of the blessing of self-control, there are fits of rage. Instead of the blessing of honesty, there is lack of trust. Instead of putting others first, there is selfishness and competition. Instead of always speaking in love, there is gossipping and slander. Romans 7:5 describes these things as fruit for death. In Galatians 5 these things are called the fruit of the sinful nature. Galatians
Growing up in a Christian home does not mean that you are completely shielded from the effects of sin. We all still fall short of God’s standards, even the best of us. All parents sin against their children sometimes, and all children sin against their parents. But it does mean that to some degree at least, you are kept safe from a life which is ravaged by sin. Your family life should be characterised by the fruit of the spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
Those are some pretty good blessings that come with growing up in a Christian home. There are some real challenges that come with those blessing though:
- Confusion over Conversion
For many people, their decision to follow Jesus came very early in life, and although their level of commitment and maturity has waxed and waned, they have basically been a Christian their whole lives. If you are someone who feels somehow inferior or unsure because you don’t remember a particular moment of conversion, don’t worry, you’re not alone! As great as it is to celebrate great conversion stories, the greatest blessing a person can have is a godly inheritance. If you inherited a faith from your parents that at some stage became your own, be thankful. Don’t worry if you don’t know the date or time that you first decided, but rejoice in the fact that you are a follower of Jesus today because of the influences God put in your life right from the beginning.
- Hypocrisy in Family and Church
The sad fact is that there are many people who have grown up in Christian homes and churches, who have been turned away by what they experienced there. When you look at the incidences of family breakdown, family violence and other abuse within the Church it is hard not to be very disappointed and disillusioned. If you have experienced these things or other evidences of hypocrisy in the church, it is hard to believe the gospel that the church preaches.
There are a lot of pastor’s kids for example who are turned off the church for two reasons:
1) They see what their parents are really like and it doesn’t add up to what they preach and present
2) They see what their parents put up with in the church and that turns them off.
It’s not just Pastor’s kids who experience this.
There are two tragedies that can occur when children notice that what actually happens in family and church do not add up to what the Bible teaches:
1) They become disillusioned and leave as soon as they are able to.
2) They learn to acknowledge the Bible mentally, but in practice they copy the example set for them – they become hypocrites themselves.
For this reason churches and families need to be serious about addressing sin. Instead of sweeping stuff under the carpet and being defensive of ourselves, we need to model an attitude of repentance and teachability. We need to learn to apologise to our children when we sin against them, and to acknowledge inconsistencies between what we say we believe and what we actually do.
Interestingly, in the Bible it is Fathers who are urged to take the lead in this. Fathers tend to struggle the most to do it! Ephesians 6:4 says: Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
Colossians
In my experience what has embittered or exasperated children most is hypocrisy in the family and in the church.
If you are someone who has been turned off by hypocrisy I want to apologise to you for that. I ask you to remember that we are all people who fall short of God’s standards, and encourage you to learn to forgive those who have sinned against you. I urge you to look to Jesus and decide what you will do with Him. Don’t be distracted by other people, no matter who they might be. They will answer to Jesus one day, just as you will.
- Unawareness of the ugliness of sin
If you are someone who has not experienced first-hand how destructive sin can be, it is very easy to get sucked in to flirting with it. You buy in to Satan’s lie that says: “God is a party-pooper. God is like your parents – He just wants you to be safe and boring.” Actually, God is nothing like that at all! But God does want what is good for you, not what is evil.
I remember being part of a group of older teenagers in a church in
However when I think about that scene I just feel really sad. I used to walk past nightclubs in
I remember a young man who became a Christian and who was really growing and loving his new life. He got involved with the group who were regularly clubbing, and something started to change in him. Over time he became less and less involved in the church and with his Christian friends. Last I saw him he basically said that all he lived for was the weekends, when he would go out, get drunk and sing karaoke! A shipwrecked life, because a group of young people were foolish enough to flirt with sin. Don’t go looking for fun and adventure where Satan is trying to sell it. Life’s only real adventure is to follow wherever God leads. Sin is ugly. God said to Cain in Genesis 4: “Sin is crouching at your door. It desires to have you.” You don’t flirt with hungry lions. Don’t flirt with sin.
- Tension of Different Worlds
There are plenty of other things that we could address today, but the last one I want to talk about is the tension of living in different worlds.
When I grew up I lived on the
In one world, I wanted to be good and to make my parents proud. Particularly I wanted to follow Jesus. I wanted that in the other world too, but I also wanted to be accepted. I wanted to fit in. Christianity doesn’t always fit that well in our world.
So there’s a tension that kids have when they grow up in Christian homes, and it can very easily lead to living two separate lives. In one life there is church and Sunday school and home. In the other is school and sport and friends.
Parents have a responsibility to teach children to live as Christians in the World – not to live in two different worlds. Sadly, many children grow up fitting in with both worlds. So even as adults they dress one way on Sunday and another way during the week. They speak one way on Sunday and another way during the week. They watch stuff on T.V. that they wouldn’t accept on the big screen in Church. They listen to things that they would never want to hear a preacher say! And somehow this doesn’t seem weird! It’s the problem of hypocrisy that we discussed earlier, but it goes even beyond that.
Perhaps the biggest problem with living in different worlds is that we don’t know how to bridge the gap. Do I talk about God with people outside my Christian world? Do I invite my friends along to church events? Do I show them that side of me that they have never seen, and what will they think of me if I do? It’s easier to keep the two worlds separate, and that is just what Satan wants. He doesn’t mind if Christians keep that stuff to themselves. God does. We are His ambassadors to the world. We are not to keep our Christianity separate from our life in the world.
I’ve got to tell you that as much as I’ve always tried to be a good witness to those around me, I’ve pretty much grown up living in two different worlds. I’ve always struggled to talk to people outside my church world about God and the difference He makes to my life. I don’t want to offend people. I want to fit in. I want to be liked. But I’m learning how to do it, and I’m praying for opportunities. I’m starting to see those opportunities. How about you?
Wednesday, 28 February 2007
Proof of Life
This isn't a full manuscript, but you'll get the idea! As usual, go here to get the audio!
Proof of Life
1 Thessalonians 1:4-10
Introduction
One day Jesus was talking to a Pharisee by the name of Nicodemus, and He explained to Nicodemus that to be a part of God’s Kingdom, you must be born again. Being part of God’s family isn’t just a change of name or a change of lifestyle; it’s a completely new life that comes from God to you.
As part of that conversation Jesus described the process of how we receive that new life. He said to Nicodemus “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.”
Today we are going to be talking about that new life that Jesus was describing to Nicodemus. We are going to explore how we can be sure that we have received it, and how we can help others to discover it.
I want to remind you before we start that this is not just trivia. Jesus went on to say this to Nicodemus: “Whoever believes in me is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son.”
As a Pharisee, Nicodemus already knew that God is going to judge the world on day. Jesus wanted Nicodemus to know that God is going to Judge the world on the basis of what people have done with Jesus. This final Judgement is recorded in Revelation chapter 20. Let’s find out what that will be like:
11 Then I saw a great white throne and him who was seated on it. Earth and sky fled from his presence, and there was no place for them. 12 And I saw the dead, great and small, standing before the throne, and books were opened. Another book was opened, which is the book of life. The dead were judged according to what they had done as recorded in the books. 13 The sea gave up the dead that were in it, and death and Hades gave up the dead that were in them, and each person was judged according to what he had done. 14 Then death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. The lake of fire is the second death. 15 If anyone’s name was not found written in the book of life, he was thrown into the lake of fire.
The New Jerusalem
21 Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. 2 I saw the
So how can we be sure that our names are in the book of life? What can we do to see other people’s names entered into that book, so they too can look forward to Christ’s return instead of fearing it?
(o/h)
Open in Prayer
So what can we learn about this new life that God wants to give us?
(o/h)
4 For we know, brothers loved by God, that he has chosen you,
1. New Life starts with a Divine Choice (v 4)
• A choice which is a mystery
• A choice which we may influence through prayer
• A choice which we may enact through witness and response
5 because our gospel came to you…you welcomed the message
2. New Life is communicated through the message of the Gospel (v 5a, 6b)
our gospel came to you not simply with words, but also with power, with the Holy Spirit and with deep conviction…You welcomed the message with the joy given by the Holy Spirit.
3. New Life is received through the illumination of the Holy Spirit (v 5-6)
You know how we lived among you for your sake. You became imitators of us and of the Lord… you turned to God from idols to serve the living and true God, and to wait for his Son from heaven, whom he raised from the dead—Jesus, who rescues us from the coming wrath
4. New Life is demonstrated by a transformed lifestyle
And so you became a model to all the believers in
5. New Life results in visible witness
Conclusion
Receiving New Life does not depend on us but on God. Some people think that they are not cut out to be a Christian. Some people don’t think that God is interested in people like them. Some people think that one day they might be like that, but for now they want to “have fun” and do what they want to do. Let me tell you: If God makes you new, all of that stuff just goes out the window. It doesn’t matter what you were like before. It doesn’t matter what you thought or what you did – you will receive a new life that is better than you could have possibly imagined. You will know that you are loved. You will know that you have a future.
Ephesians 2 describes it like this: once we were all just doing what we thought was best for ourselves, but really we were just making a mess of our lives. We were destined for hell. But God suddenly opened our eyes and gave us new life through Jesus.
On Friday night several of the athletes shared about the things that they used to chase after in life, and how messed up their lives were as a result. It doesn’t matter what your “idol” is – girls, boys, drugs, booze, sport, school, work, whatever. None of that will give you the life you really want, the life God created you to have. The life that is destined for heaven not for hell.
If you are listening to this today and you know deep inside that it is true, here’s what you need to do. You need to realise that God is speaking to you. To you it’s not just another boring sermon. You know that God wants you. You know that He wants you to give up all the stuff that you have been chasing after. You know that Jesus died for your sins, and now you need to give Him control of your life.
Monday, 19 February 2007
Sermon - Discovering the Power of Prayer
Discovering the Power of Prayer
1 Thessalonians 1:1-3
Story
George is doing some paperwork in the dining room when he has some interesting encounters with his children.
Steve, his 14 year-old son, walks in from school and dumps some homework on the table. “I need some help with this” he mutters, and wanders off to play Playstation.
An hour or so later Joy, his 16 year-old daughter, comes in after spending time at the shops with her friends. “I hate my skin and my body shape”, she says. “Thanks for the crummy genetics dad” she grumbles as she slips on her headphones.
Just before dinner his 19 year-old son Mark, comes in shuffling some papers of his own. “I’m getting a loan for that Ford GT. I need you to go guarantor for me.” With that he places the papers on top of Georges paperwork and strolls off to the kitchen to find something to eat.
How do you reckon George is feeling right now?
Steve said he wanted help, but he is not taking any responsibility himself. He wants George to make his life easier. What he needs is for George to help him learn.
Joy is feeling low, and she takes it out on her dad. She wants to stew in her misery, and if her dad wants to help he should buy her some nicer clothes or beauty treatments. What she needs is comfort, someone to listen to her insecurities and fears and to care about that. She needs gentle instruction about true beauty, and how inner beauty finds its way to the outside too.
Mark thinks that he needs a hot car, and the GT is just the thing. He needs George to sign on to the loan to have any hope of getting that car. What he really needs is guidance. He needs to talk things through with George to make sure that this really is the right decision to make, and to work out how George is going to support him in doing what is wise.
Sometimes you and I relate to God a bit like Steve, Joy and Mark relate to George. We do to our Heavenly Father what they did to their earthly father. All of us can at times be distant, moody and demanding.
That is not the sort of family life that God wants with His children. And even though like Steve, Joy and Mark we don’t realise it, that’s not the sort of family life that we want with God. We were created for something more. We long for something more.
Prayer
Lord, help us to learn afresh today how we can relate to you as our Heavenly Father. Help us to hear You speaking to us today. Help us to have open hearts and minds to receive what it is that you tell us. Amen.
Recap
Those who were here last week will know that we are starting a series in the book of 1 Thessalonians. Last week we explored the story of the book and we discovered that it really is a good news story. In many of the New Testament letters we hear of problems occurring within churches which need urgent attention. This letter to the Thessalonians is mainly a letter of thanksgiving and celebration, because things have been going so well in the church. The Christians are sticking by the truth of the Gospel, and their lives demonstrate that God is at work within them.
As we approach the text we can ask the question: “What was it that helped this church to be so effective in its life and ministry? What can we imitate today?” We started answering that question last week, but there is more to come. So with that in mind, let’s start reading.
1 Thessalonians 1:1-2
Paul, Silas and Timothy,
To the church of the Thessalonians in God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ:
Grace and peace to you.
2 We always thank God for all of you, mentioning you in our prayers.
3 We continually remember before our God and Father your work produced by faith, your labor prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ.
The first thing we discover in reading the letter to the Thessalonians that gives us a clue to their vitality is this: they were people who were prayed for.
Paul would later write this encouragement to the Christians in
Knowing that the Thessalonians copied the example of Paul and the example of Jesus, we can deduce that like Paul and like Jesus they became people of prayer themselves. In the closing stages of his letter, Paul asks that they continue to imitate him in this respect. He asks them to pray continually, and to pray specifically for Paul and his companions just as they are prayed for by Paul and his companions. You get the feeling that Paul believes prayer is important!
So today we are going to talk a little bit about prayer, and we are going to see if this is an area of our lives that God is going to grow us in this week.
What is Prayer?
Let’s first say what prayer is not! Read Matthew 6:5-8 with me:
5 “And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. 6 But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. 7 And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. 8 Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.”
- Prayer is not about impressing People
A lot of people struggle to pray in public for exactly this reason – we keep thinking about what others think of us. There are insecurities that bubble up and stop us from praying freely. There’s pride which causes us to pray to the people instead of to God. We pray or don’t pray because of what we want others to think or not think about us. That’s not the prayer that God is interested in.
- Prayer is not about impressing God
Sometimes people struggle to comprehend a God who genuinely loves us and is interested and involved with us. Like hopeful pagans, they think that there is a formula to prayer that will succeed in getting their wishes granted. In most world religions there are ceremonies or processes that need to be completed before someone can pray to their gods. In a sense they need to earn the right to be heard, the right to receive the attention of their god. That’s not Christian prayer. Jesus says that God is already interested in you and aware of your needs.
- Prayer is about drawing near to God
Remember our study in Hebrews 10 a few weeks back? We described how Jesus has done everything required to bring us into the presence of God, to make us a part of God’s family. Listen again to Hebrews 10:22 “let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith”.
That is the essence of prayer – drawing near to God in faith and sincerity.
I came across a great little article on prayer from the Greek Orthodox Archdiocese of America. This is part of what it said:
Prayer is the way to renewal and spiritual life. Prayer is aliveness to God. Prayer is strength, refreshment, and joy. Through the grace of God and our disciplined efforts prayer lifts us up from our isolation to a conscious, loving communion with God in which everything is experienced in a new light. Prayer becomes a personal dialogue with God, a spiritual breathing of the soul, a foretaste of the bliss of God's kingdom.
Holy Pascha,
Prayer is conversation with God. It is speaking and listening. It is growing in intimacy. It is growing in confidence and depth.
- Prayer is about drawing near to others
The Apostle Paul longed to be there for the Thessalonians to support them, but he couldn’t draw near to them in person. However he could draw near to them in prayer. Prayer can never just be about ourselves, it must include others. In fact Paul wrote in 1 Timothy 2:1 “I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone”
Paul demonstrates this in how he prays for the Thessalonians. He thanks God for them, he remembers them and their needs. So while physically distant he is spiritually standing side by side with them.
How should we pray?
Let me read to you a little more from the article from the Greek Orthodox Church that I mentioned earlier…
How is one to pray? Only the Holy Spirit can guide us to pray as we should. Just as a child learns to walk by walking, one can best learn to pray by praying, trusting in the help of God. Put your whole soul into your prayer. Think about the meaning of every word you pray. Make it your own personal prayer. Be persistent in prayer. Do not yield to carelessness or neglect. Strengthen your prayer through a lively faith in the Lord, a spirit of forgiveness toward others, and genuine Christian living.
As we pray deeply within our hearts we grow in prayer. By the grace of God we suddenly catch a glimpse of the miracle of the presence of the Holy Spirit working within us. At first it is only a spark but later it becomes a flame freeing and energizing our whole being, provided we do nothing to grieve the Holy Spirit; and if we do sin we repent of our sin immediately and ask for God's forgiveness. To experience the fire of God's holy love, to give it space within us to do its cleansing and healing work as a breath of the Holy Spirit, and to use it as light and power for daily living -- such are the goals as well as the fruits of true prayer.
What I love about this article is that it summarises a large number of Scriptures which talk about prayer, and it reflects the experiences of Christians through the ages.
I am going to give you some practical suggestions to develop your prayer life. Remember that these are not formulas to help you impress God or other people by how well you pray. They are tools that you can use to help you develop a lifestyle of prayer.
· Develop good routines
The first part of a good prayer routine involves setting a time and place. Think about the best time and place for you to be unhurried, uninterrupted and clear-minded.
The second part involves a routine of content. Include time for reading your Bible, as prayer involves listening and not just speaking. Use an outline such as ACTS (Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving and Supplication) to help you develop a well-rounded prayer focus.
The third part involves a routine of response. Learn to respond prayerfully to all the situations of life. Talk to God about what you are doing, how you are feeling, what you need help with or whatever. Eventually it will become second nature to you. Our responses to circumstances are learned behaviours. That’s why psychologists use therapies like Cognitive Behavioural Therapy to train people to respond better to things that are going on in their lives. Christians are in training too. We are not training to sort out a few problems in our lives or to be more successful. We are training to live in close relationship with God through the Holy Spirit. I have a saying which goes like this: “Circumstances are not God; God is God”. Too often I see and hear people (including myself) live as though they do not have a choice about what they do and how they feel. We do have a choice, and we make that choice in how we respond to the circumstances of life. When we respond prayerfully, we keep God on His throne in our lives.
- Surround yourself with reminders
Put verses like Colossians 4:2 up on posters around the house. Put a prayer journal by your bed. Do cross-stitch or whatever else you can to have reminders around you to jog your mind to be drawing close to God in whatever you are doing through the day. Listen to Christian songs, radio, messages or the Bible on CD. Surround yourself with things that will stimulate you to be moving through your day in conversation with God.
- Recruit a support team
We’ve talked a fair bit in recent weeks about the importance of the church. The Thessalonians learned prayer by imitating Paul and Paul’s companions. We learn prayer by doing it with each other. Get yourself into a group that prays. Commit to pray for someone else as a prayer partner. Ask someone to check on you sometimes to see how you are going in prayer. Learn to talk about what you are praying about and share answers to prayer.
Conclusion
There’s a church in
Some of you may have heard of Andrew Evans, founder of the Family First political party. In 1970 he was invited to be the pastor of an Assemblies of God church in
It’s funny how God sometimes brings us to the point of hopelessness so that we can learn to depend on Him. The Apostle Paul couldn’t do a thing for the Thessalonians except pray for them. Andrew Evans was feeling like a failure as a pastor – he couldn’t grow the church and he could solve people’s problems. Theologically, we know that this is always true, but sometimes we place too much importance in our own efforts.
Andrew agreed to help the man if he would agree to meet every Saturday for prayer and fasting. They prayed for the marriage, for the church, for the community and so on. After 8 months this grew to include other members of the congregation. They had 31 people who set aside one day a month each for prayer and fasting – every day of each month was covered. By 1992 there were 300 people who were on the intercessor’s group – people who give one day a week to prayer and fasting. Andrew observed that whenever members are slack in their commitment to prayer, it is felt in the church.
Adapted from an article in Renewal Journal
(c) Renewal Journal #2 (93:2),
http://www.renewaljournal.com/
A lot of people look at churches like
If you want to be challenged more about the importance of prayer, read this book – Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire by Jim Cymbala.
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