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This message wraps up the list of qualifications for Elders by looking at what it means for Elders to be "not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money, must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him with proper respect and must not be a recent convert." We play particular attention to the issues of the use or abuse of alcohol and the question of whether an Elder should be evaluated by the faith of his children in addition to their conduct and attitude.
Leadership in the Church pt 5
The Qualifications of Elders 3
22/11/09
Recap
So far in our studies we have determined the first 6 qualifications necessary of Elders:
1. An Elder must be a man
2. An Elder must be above reproach
3. An Elder must be faithful to his wife if he is married
4. An Elder must be temperate, self-controlled, respectable
5. An Elder must be hospitable
6. An Elder must be able to teach
It’s taken us two weeks to do these first 6, which means we’re halfway there! We’re going to attempt to finish the last 6 all in one session, so let’s get started!
1 Timothy 3:1-7
Here is a trustworthy saying: If anyone sets his heart on being an overseer, he desires a noble task. 2 Now the overseer must be above reproach, the husband of but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach,
…now for the next group…
3 not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. 4 He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him with proper respect. 5 (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?) 6 He must not be a recent convert, or he may become conceited and fall under the same judgment as the devil. 7 He must also have a good reputation with outsiders, so that he will not fall into disgrace and into the devil’s trap. [1]
Adding Detail to the Big Picture
If you remember our discussion on the first qualifications, you will remember that the first two qualifications really cover everything – An Elder must be a man (this is God’s sovereign choice and not a matter of gender superiority) who is above reproach (not perfect but someone who sets a good example even in how they deal with their sins).
If you look at the rest of the qualifications, they all describe specific ways in which the Elder applies himself to be a man who is above reproach –whether that’s as a husband, father, community member or whatever.
You will also notice as we go through today that our fourth qualification: being temperate, self-controlled and respectable is also described in more detail by these later qualifications.
Let’s deal with them one by one:
7. An Elder must be not given to drunkenness
This is one example of what it means to be temperate – to be clear-minded and not under the control of any substances, desires or influences other than the Holy Spirit of God.
A person who is given to drunkenness cannot see clearly to act wisely - to discern God’s will and follow His ways. They will say and do things that will damage themselves and others and dishonour God.
I love this community very much and have great respect for it’s strengths, but I think we all realise that perhaps it’s greatest weakness is the attitude that most of it’s members have toward alcohol abuse. I am astounded again and again at the attitude of toleration and even admiration for alcohol-fuelled stupidity that I see reflected in comments, attitudes and behaviours of even very respectable, intelligent and prominent community members.
This week Police Commissioners from across Australia and New Zealand have been meeting in Perth, and one of the outcomes of that has been a decision to have an intensive blitz in December against alcohol-fuelled violence.
W.A. Commissioner Karl O'Callaghan said:
"We as police commissioners are sick and tired of alcohol-fuelled violence, we want to do something about it, we want to make a national statement about it” He went on to say “This is not of course the answer, in the longer term of course we have to work a bit further upstream and stop this alcohol binge drinking related violence we're seeing."
[2]
In a report for Australian Government last year, researchers calculated alcohol abuse in
Australia to cost our economy in excess of 10 billion dollars. This includes healthcare costs of approximately $2b, road accident costs of over $2b and criminal activity costs of over $1.4b.
[3]
The economic cost is one thing, but the real issue is the effect on people’s lives. You and I know people whose lives have been cut short or irreparably damaged because of alcohol abuse. It’s an immeasurable tragedy.
Churches and the community in general need people that they look up to who demonstrate a proper attitude toward alcohol. We certainly cannot afford leaders who are part of this massive problem! We cannot afford leaders who have their judgement and behaviour impaired and reputation damaged by being given to drunkenness.
Over the years that I have been in Narembeen I’ve shared a beer or a glass of wine with people in a number of different situations. My own personal rule, as well as obviously avoiding going anywhere near drunkenness, has been to not drink any alcohol in an environment where some people might be taking it too far. I want to make sure no-one mistakenly puts me in the same basket as people who are getting drunk, and I also want to make a very clear distinction in my behaviour. I have also been very public in my comments about drunkenness, sometimes causing offense by my disapproval.
Some people here are very similar to myself, others choose not to consume alcohol at all. Some people who have been a part of this church have regularly consumed alcohol privately but not publicly. Some have been happy to consume alcohol publicly but not in church-run events or events hosted on church property.
To his or her own master each person stands or falls (Romans 14:4), but when it comes to who we should choose as an Elder, the Biblical qualification is clear: he must not be given to drunkenness. Be careful about applying your own convictions to anyone else. I understand that some people would like to apply their own common sense or personal preferences in addition to what the Bible says, but that is actually incredibly dangerous for a number of reasons.
If you have a group of leaders – as we do at the moment – who are committed to the Bible but who differ in some areas of practice such as this one, then you will have a church that follows the Bible as it’s rule and encourages freedom and the guidance of the Holy Spirit within the boundaries of clear biblical teaching. You will have a church that lives up to our motto in Churches of Christ: “In essentials, unity. In non-essentials, liberty. In all things, love.” (This saying is from Augustine in the 4th century, we just claimed it as a motto!).
However if you choose leaders based on agreement on non-essential things, your church will end up being defined by those things. You might think that is a good thing, but it actually kills freedom, enforces conformity instead of acceptance and produces an attitude of legalism which then in turn produces exasperation and rebellion. If you don’t believe me just talk to each other for a while and you will discover that this has in fact been your experience on occasion!
8. An Elder must not be violent but gentle, not quarrelsome
Who normally rises to positions of power and prominence? Usually it is the people who pursue it the hardest – people who know what they want and don’t let anyone or anything get in their way. Not so with leadership in the Church. Leadership is about service and sacrifice motivated by love for God and others, not selfish ambition. As James writes about in his letter, quarrels and fighting come from competing selfish desires. People are prepared to do anything in order to get what they want (James 4:1). When people do not get what they want they become angry and resort to verbal or physical violence.
An Elder must not be a bully. He must not attempt to push people around. He must not be in any way abusive toward others. Rather he must be gentle in manner. Even when he must correct and rebuke he must do it with gentleness. Gentleness is proof of a heart motivated by love and not selfishness.
Closely related to the negative trait of violence is that of being quarrelsome.
We discussed this when we looked at the requirement of being able to teach in our last session. A quarrelsome person loves to argue and they love to win! Their pride causes them to esteem their own opinions and dismiss the opinions of others. A quarrelsome person is not a learner. They have no interest in being taught, only in being right.
An Elder on the other hand faithfully teaches, corrects, rebukes and encourages without getting caught up in endless arguments that lead nowhere and produce no good fruit. An Elder does not let his ego or his desires get in the way of sticking to the Bible and seeking God’s glory.
In the parallel passage in Titus 1 we read that Elders must not be overbearing or quick-tempered, again reinforcing the gentleness and patience required of an Elder.
9. An Elder must not be a lover of money
In Titus 1:7 this is described as “not pursuing dishonest gain”.
It is very possible to be so desperate for money that you compromise your values in order to obtain it or keep it. It is possible to be so desperate for money that you omit to report accurately on your tax return, or pay back what you owe, or cheat your customers, or steal from others.
Jesus said “You cannot serve both God and money” (Matt 6:24, Lk 16:13).
It is said that money is a great tool but a terrible master. Jesus isn’t focussing on money itself here, but on everything that it can provide. Money can buy friends. It can buy power. It can buy respect. It can buy comforts and pleasures. It can buy beauty. It can buy sex. It can provide security. It can provide freedom. It can boost our self-esteem. It can buy most things that we selfishly desire.
A godly person is content with what they have and trusts God for what they need (eg. Heb 13:5). An Elder must be an example of this. If an Elder is desperate for what money can provide, there is a danger that he will use his position for financial gain (see 1 Peter 5:2) or else he will use his position to gain some of those things that he desires more than he desires to please God.
10. He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him with proper respect
Again, this qualification touches on gender roles. We won’t go too deeply into that subject as it is a big one, but we believe that God has established husbands and fathers as leaders of their households. The bible is not just reflecting what was going on at the time it was written, it is actually communicating to us God’s design for families. It is tragic that this leadership role has been terribly abused by men in their sinfulness over the centuries. It is also tragic when a wife and mother does not follow God’s design for her role as intimate companion and helpmate.
However in this passage we are only dealing with the qualifications necessary for men aspiring to the role of Elder. Since an Elder is entrusted with being a leader in the church of God, he should be a man who has first demonstrated integrity and maturity in his leadership of his own household.
Now the word translated as “family” here in the NIV is simply the word for “house” and is also used for those who dwell in it. In some cases this might also include servants or even slaves in the case of wealthy converts to Christianity. It is helpful to recognise this fact, as sometimes people have asked about how long a man is accountable for the behaviour of his children. The simple answer is that as long as the children reside in his house, a father is responsible to ensure that his children obey him (and their mother) with proper respect. That’s a big challenge! Anyone who has been a parent knows that it is one thing to get obedience, but obedience with respect is another matter altogether!
It doesn’t come about by trying to force it onto a child. It doesn’t happen under a rule of iron. That only produces fear and resentment, even if they are savvy enough not to let it show.
It comes about when fathers nurture and care for their children as well as providing the necessary discipline.
An Elder should be a man who has the respect of his children. He should be someone who has selflessly cared for them in the same way an Elder cares for the congregation.
This qualification is quite straightforward until we turn to our parallel passage in Titus!
In Titus 1:6 we read that an Elder must be “a man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient.”
The part about being wild and disobedient echoes what Paul instructed Timothy, but he appears to add an extra qualification to Titus that he did not mention to Timothy – that his children must believe.
I have seen many different interpretations of this verse, and many different ways of applying it to Elders, so over the last month I have done a lot of study on this one verse in the light of the rest of Scripture.
The issue stems from the Greek word used in Titus 1:6 – pistos. It usually means someone who is faithful, who can be trusted. It can also mean someone who has faith, someone who trusts. The NIV and many other translations have opted for the latter meaning, however the KJV and NKJV translations among some others have opted for “faithful children” or similar wording.
Scholars who argue that Paul is saying that an Elder’s children must be believers tend to emphasise that if a man is to be entrusted with building the faith of a congregation he must have proven successful in nurturing and establishing faith in his children. Many would say that this requirement ends with a child coming to an age of responsibility and/or leaving home. At such a time they must make their own choice about whether to continue in their faith or not.
This raises some massive theological issues. Of course an Elder should be a person who has nurtured faith in their children. However the Bible teaches that none of us can produce faith in our children or in anyone else. Personally, I find that a very disturbing truth! I have often stood over the beds or cot that my children are sleeping in and realised just how powerless I am to determine their future, all I can do is entrust them to God and do my best to nurture them and be an example for them. I can expect them to adhere to the standards of our home while they reside in it, but I cannot require them to share my faith, it just doesn’t work that way.
Another key issue is that it would be very strange for Paul to write something to Titus which is so different to what he wrote to Timothy. If he is saying that children must be faithful, that fits very easily with what he commanded Timothy – a child who is faithful is obedient and respectful. He or she can be counted on to do what the father has entrusted to him or her and to be the sort of person that he or she has been raised to be. However to insist upon the child believing in Christ for salvation is to presume upon both the sovereignty of God and the free will of the child, to say that the child’s salvation can instead be determined by the father if that father is of sufficient maturity and character. I don’t believe the Bible as a whole supports that view.
11. An Elder must not be a recent convert
Remember an Elder is someone of spiritual maturity who can be an example and a help to others in following Jesus. If we were to appoint recent converts to the position, it would create the false idea that some people are natural spiritual leaders! That sentence doesn’t make sense and neither does the idea of appointing new believers to the role of Elder. Yes, we can all learn from new believers. Yes, we can all benefit from them and what God does through them. But you do not become spiritually mature overnight! It takes years of faithfully following God through all the experiences of life. It takes years of studying the Bible to get a firm foundation in the truth.
Paul warns that there is a danger that a new believer appointed to the role of Elder “may become conceited and fall into the same judgement as the devil” (v6). This is precisely because the church has esteemed them in their natural selves before they have had a chance to be transformed in character, motivation and behaviour by the consistent working of God’s Spirit, Word and People. They may be successful in business, have a winning personality or natural leadership skill, but none of these things are qualifications for spiritual leadership.
The devil’s pride fuelled selfish ambition – he wanted to be exalted over God. When we celebrate a person’s natural abilities and achievements instead of the affirming the spiritual transformation worked by God, we make it very difficult for them to not become proud. They begin to believe that they know best. They look down on others. They rely on their own wisdom instead of seeking God’s. The result is catastrophic for them and for the church.
We need to nurture and support new believers. Not stifle them in order to keep the status quo, but neither rush them into positions they are not yet ready for.
12. An Elder must also have a good reputation with outsiders
Verse 7 tells us that “He must also have a good reputation with outsiders, so that he will not fall into disgrace and into the devil’s trap.”
Now remember that the devil is proud. He wants to be exalted over God, and so he does everything he can to darken people’s minds to the reality of the glory of God. He does not want anyone to be saved and to worship God, rather he is glorified when people do the things that are contrary to God’s character.
When it comes to his agenda against the Church, Satan wants to bring God down in the minds of Christians so that they live for themselves instead of God, dishonouring God through their disobedience.
He also wants to make sure that this is witnessed by unbelievers, so that instead of seeing our good deeds and praising our Father who is in heaven (Matt 5:16, 1 Peter 2:12), they see things in our lives which cause them to dismiss our beliefs and our Saviour.
As leaders and public representatives of the church, Elders are very much in Satan’s sights. He gets great value from leaders who fall into disgrace. I remember being at school as a teenager and other kids would make comments about some of the scandals that were going on with famous T.V. preachers at that time. I was so ashamed and frustrated by that – imagine how God must feel when his representatives are shoddy in how they represent him. That goes for all of us, but especially our leaders.
As part of that I would remind you of the importance of praying for your leaders. They need the grace of God to stand firm against temptation, because our enemy will do all he can to frustrate their work for God and ruin their reputation and that of the Church so that he might ruin the reputation of God in the minds of people. As we’ve discussed earlier, this goes for his whole family as well.
Conclusion
REMEMBER: These are qualities for all of us to aspire to, but they are essential qualities for leaders to possess.
As you look at this list I trust that God will point out to you some things that He wants to address in your own journey of following Jesus.
As we look toward appointing Elders I trust that God will point out to you the people that are well advanced in their journey of following Jesus, whose lives are marked by these qualities and who will make faithful and effective leaders for our congregation.
[1]All Scriptures from The Holy Bible : New International Version. 1996, c1984. Grand Rapids: Zondervan.
[3] “The avoidable costs of alcohol abuse in Australia and the potential benefits of effective policies to reduce the social costs of alcohol” Publications Number: P3-4246 © Commonwealth of Australia 2008
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